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Post by Charlie Allison on Sept 1, 2016 4:41:11 GMT
I'm a bit frazzled, but this chapter has been bouncing around my head for a while, in a plentitude of forms. Some onerous, others less so. I'd love to get your impressions of this work--I wrote it for my MFA program under a super tight deadline--so i'm sure there are a thicket of errors i didn't catch. Even still, I'm trying to walk the tight rope between independent short story and a novel chapter--so I embedded some questions into the text of the chapter itself. Hope it isn't too painful--I'm really at a loss as to what to do with this bloody thing, so any feedback would be appreciated. Charlie Charlies Week One submission 2016 Departures.pdf (85.49 KB) |
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Julia
New Member
Posts: 38 
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Post by Julia on Sept 12, 2016 16:46:55 GMT
Charlies Week One submission 2016 Departure....pdf (158.71 KB) Hi Charlie, I really like the setting of this story. There is something warm and cozy and romantic about an isolated cottage, and the details about Cuwart's chores make it feel realistic. The warmth and realism ground the magical elements. I think it could easily be a short story since there is a complete plot. The only changes I would suggest would be to better define Reinhart and Cuwart. I feel Reinhart's charm in his dialogue, but didn't quite get why Cuwart fell for him. Cuwart was more of a cipher for me. I wasn't sure if his dream was to work at a place like the library or if he just enjoyed studying and living in his cottage.
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Post by eldercheese on Sept 12, 2016 18:11:52 GMT
Its weird I often talk (or shriek) at charlie about his stories in person so I often forget to chime in here. Or is this a different draft then the version I read previously? Though that is a keen point brought up by Jlr. It a point I missed because Reinhart was very charming in the story so it covered over the whys somewhat. Which is ironically how Reinhart gets away with a lot of his darkest deeds isn't it?
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